A broken heart

She smiled at me with those jet black orbs
the laughter in her eyes kindling glowing embers so deep
the music in her laugh filling me with a mystic joy
is she the one who would complete me?
is she the one who will hold my hand and talk in silence?
is she the one who will reaffirm my faith in love,
who will walk beside me through this life and
take me as I am?

I laugh at her antics, the mischief she plots, the pranks she plays
My heart throbs with a pulsating rhythm every time she looks at me
Our hands find each other, I draw her close
I bask in her fragrance, entranced in her flawless beauty.
We are surrounded by a sea of people,
mirth and laughter rent the air in an endless cacophony
but to me, we are far away from mankind, in a dream perhaps
we walked an empty road, golden leaves on either side
a spring in our steps, a twinkle in our eyes,
the light of love filling the surreal glade
in a world built for just the two of us.

And then, the reverie broke, the dream collapsed,
our hands unclasped, the fingers lingering for a second.
And like a white knight in shining armor came her man,
She threw her hands around him, their eyes met
and she spoke those words I so dreaded
He smiled and lifted her up beside him on his noble steed
My little world fell apart, my heart broken,
shattering into a million shards
I sank to my knees as the steed galloped away,
the hoofs drowning my sorrow as they rode
silhouetted against the sinking sun,
At the last instant, she turned , looked at me
She smiled and then she was gone.
I turned back to that road, now truly empty
my tread heavy, an infinite sadness enveloping me
as even the sun withdrew his last rays
I shivered in the cold breeze
the leaves rustling uneasily in the growing darkness
as if the very world mourned with me...

Hues of Orange and yellow..

The Camry glided through the meandering mountain road. A gently rising hill on the left, a steep decline exploding with an abundance of trees on the right and an umbrella of leaves of every shade of orange and yellow glowing in the warm sunlight. The cool wind caressed my face as I eased my machine through beautifully winding S curves and hairpins.

Fall break - A time to get away from the troubles, hassles and stress of the graduate life and give in to nature's seduction। The night before, we were at Helen a quaint little german town nestled in the mountains away from the hustle and bustle of the cities. We had walked through the town to the feste hall, a germanesque gathering with gallons of beer and live german music. The place was a throwback to the Renaissance days in europe. The feste hall evoked images of big, burly men sitting on long wooden tables, guzzling beer in one hand and gnawing on a giant turkey leg or pork chop in the other. Voluptuous dames in corsets and flowing skirts flirted, laughed and danced away. We got into the act downing 6-7 pitchers of beer between 8 of us and burnt up the dance floor.

The next morning saw us gliding through helen's outskirts following a stream for some way which coalesced into a full blown lake. The crisp and chilly mountain air lay heavily on the water, the rising sun seared it, vaporizing the top layer and releasing a steam floating over the lake in a serene symphony. All through helen and its outskirts, we encountered a plethora of biker gangs of all types and ages guzzling beer and milling around in pubs and cafes. Clad in leather biker jackets, jet black helmets and all-weather boots they screamed past us in their harleys, the handles glinting like diamonds in the sun, the thundering growl of the engines echoing through the mountains. A short trek through the forest canopy brought us to the small, albeit picturesque Anna ruby falls. The large stream from the falls tumbled through a twisted river bed, bounding over rocks and foliage, glistening in patches in places where golden shafts of sunlight managed to permeate the canopy. All around were nature's handiwork at its best. The canopy cast speckled patterns on the forest floor, the gentle wind flirted with the trees, kissed our faces, the rays of sunlight danced across the glades lighting up the leaves, trees, and folk alike.

The drive from Robbinsville, NC to our campsite - roughly 25 miles was one of the most astoundingly beautiful drives I've ever been on. We hardly passed a single car during that stretch. It was just the winding 2 lane road, thick forests on either side and the low growl of the camry. Occasionally, a break in the woods would reveal stunning vistas. We got glimpses of an idyllic lake, its smooth, mirror like surface reflecting the sky so perfectly there almost appeared to be two skies one on top of another! Another such break revealed the undulating summits of the smokies , the tops of the canopy painted by the supreme power in a wild and vibrant conflagration of red, orange, brown, yellow and so many hues in betwixt. The dry, aging and multi-colored leaves sauntered across the road driven by an unseen breeze, only to be whipped up into a psychedelic frenzy by our car.

Rattleford Campsite atlast - two to three clearings in pristine, untouched forest land, a small shack that served as the camp host's office and a small brick building housing the restrooms. All these surrounded by miles of virgin woods. The paths to the clearings were thickly carpeted in reddish brown and yellow leaves, that crackled and crunched under our feet. Night came fast, like a hungry beast swallowing up the warmth and the light. The blood red sun slunk behind the mountains, reluctantly as if cowering under the darkness' gaze, but not without one last fiery red blaze that set the woods aflame with a reddish halo. We got a cozy little campfire going, the tents were up, the spicy, succulent chicken and the veggie patties roasting over red, hot coal. As the night grew older and colder, we all huddled together near the fire - a cool guiness in hand, 20 awesome people around, singing, dancing and laughing. It was sometime then, amidst all the camaraderie, the haze of the fire, the cold fingers of the night, the alcohol induced swagger, that I mused - I wasn't doing well at school, a real job remained a distant dream, a mountain of debts taunted me and I was well and truly in a mid-life crisis . I realized, despite all this doom and gloom, there were still moments in life, especially when one was so close to mother nature, so close to friends, that it was the little joys in life that truly mattered. I realized that I did not need truck loads of money , I did not need fame, I did not need social acceptance to revel in such a visceral tryst with nature, to close my eyes and feel the heat of the fire on my face, to laugh without a care, to dance like no one was watching, to lie on my back and stare up at the heavens on a chilly fall night. I realized that it was the journey and not the destination that mattered, that I was truly happy in that bubble right there, even though it might last for just a day or two. And so it was that my trials, troubles and tribulations lay forgotten, and receded into the dark recesses of the night, and I turned back to the laughter to enjoy my tiny little bubble of happiness into the waking hours of the dawn.

The Social Network

Before you ask, this has nothing to do with the movie. Anyway, I am confident that you, the reader, is a person who logs on to facebook, twitter and/or any of the umpteen social networking sites at least twice a day. Ever since the inception of the social network, the world has become connected in a way it never has been in the past. In fact, one can draw a parable between the way the invention of the telephone revolutionized how we communicate, and the way that social networks are revamping global communication today.

From 10 year olds to 60 year olds almost everyone uses at least one social networking site if not more on a daily basis. With the internet becoming an indispensable necessity the world is increasingly growing dependent on the web to communicate. Social networking is especially a rage among high schoolers and college students. In fact one in every 14 people are registered on facebook. Facebook was started by a bored Mark Zuckerberg at Harvard initially just to post pictures of girls at Harvard and have guys rate them on their beauty. From a handful of college graduates in 2004 to 500 million people in 2010 Facebook has revolutionized the way we connect with each other. Umpteen other networking sites sprang up trying to emulate the success formula of facebook but few managed to wriggled their way into people's daily lives. Twitter is one such successful effort although honestly, it escapes me why people would bother with a site where all you can do is put up status messages less than 42 chars. I mean facebook already does that and so much more. Anyway, twitter and "tweeting" has become the rage with celebs and politicians and a new weapon for the papparazzi to intrude even further into celeb's private lives. This is especially true when a star tweets something in the heat of the moment and the media pounces on it and starts an uproar. Case in point, is Mr.Lalit modi's tweet about stakeholders in IPL 3. That little line started a string of scandals, law suits and political name calling that has still not abated. The slew of smart phones invading today's market is another catalyst for the growth of these networking sites. With practically every phone being connected to the internet and having specific apps for facebook and twitter, every person is connected to all of his friends practically every minute of his day.

What does this all mean in the bigger scheme of things? How is this phenomenon being integrated into our social fabric? Well capitalists can rejoice because right now there is no better marketing tool than facebook and twitter. Anything and everything posted on these sites reaches millions of people faster than any marketing campaign ever can. Big corporations, small businesses, startups everyone is jumping on the facebook bandwagon, posting ads, links to the company website, polls, events etc etc. In fact companies actually hire people to market the company on the web through social networking sites. These sites are a huge boon for non-profit organizations like PETA who have limited resources but make maximum use of the opportunities networking sites offer them.

Coming to the reason these sites were actually created in the first place for - social networking. I am not ashamed to admit that I am practically addicted to facebook. The first thing I do in the morning is fire up my laptop, open my browser and before anything else open facebook. There is this urge to find out what our friends are upto, post status messages on a whim and share mundane stuff. And this is true of almost 80% of my friends. I wonder how we managed to stay connected with people before facebook arrived. And nowadays when you make new acquaintances you dont ask for their phone number or business card - you ask for their facebook profile name or linked in profile name.

The most interesting aspect of this phenomenon according to me is its impact on relationships, be it love, friendship, or any other relationship for that matter. Today flirting , proposing , reconciling, apologizing, arguing, conspiring, laughing and umpteen other emotions are being shared through electronic ether. I feel today's generation has lost the human touch in emotions, the reason we are different from robots, the genuineness of displaying emotions face to face. It's sad that laughter no longer involves your facial muscles and tears are no longer wet and salty but is instead just three keystrokes. No more cute little handwritten love notes, no more waiting for that special phone call, no more hanging out with friends on street corners to gossip. On the flip side there are enormous advantages too. Consider 2 people chatting online. One can always take the time to think about his response and its effects. When you r not face to face with the other person, you can express yourself in ways that wouldn't be very possible face to face. You can manipulate, coax, cajole, lie, plead, scream through typed words rather than enduring the physical and mental restraints you would have had to overcome in person. The net effect is that typed words mean much less than the spoken word. Emotions lose their power, apologies lose their sincerity and love loses its lustre when expressed through type. But the typed word allows otherwise self-conscious, introverted people to socialize and express themselves like never before. No wonder facebook was founded by a socially challenged student! With friends,relatives, colleagues and pretty much everybody connected through facebook there also comes considerations of appropriateness in your activities online. Should I post this pic or not? will some of my relatives see it? what will my friends think of me? what if my boss sees this status ? should I ignore my mom's friend request???!! One can vent anger at one's boss through an innocuous status message only for it to find its way to the boss through a chatty colleague. Pictures of bachelor parties have a good chance of finding its way to conservative family members, drunken rants anger our special someones, vendettas play out in public every now and then, relationships are forged, shattered, remembered, forgotten and our very lives are played out digitally day after day. We have forgotten to go out and play in the sun, to close our eyes and feel the breeze on our face, to smell nature's cocktail of aromas, to look into another's eyes and understand them, to hold hands and speak in silence, to talk gibberish for hours on end, to speak not to communicate but to find solace in the emotion of conversations, to feel human, to feel civilized and to limit living our lives digitally and embrace the essence of humanity.

Angel

Into my life, came she,

Like a lovely lily, floating

on a springy breeze , as fragrant

as the first raindrop on dry earth;

Spell bound, was I, to behold,

an epitome of perfection,

a masterpiece of God himself.

Sacrosanct, was she in mind

and body, like nectar her voice,

like the rustle of autumn leaves, her tread,

an embodiement of divine beauty, was she.

Frozen, I stood, as she spoke her first words to me,

for, words they were not, but the song of a being

superlative and superior than I, a mere mortal.

Suspended in limbo,was I, trying to open a portal

to the serene shores of her limitless heart.

Hours, it seemed or days it might have been,that we sat talking

under the star spangled carpet that was the milky way

unfurled across the inky black canvas of the Creator.

Our whispered words mingling into an Ode,

unbound by time, unruffled by adversity,

that echoed across the vast emptiness of my soul,

filling it with the vibrance of youth, the light of love.

At that instant I realised;

if death approached me thence,

gladly would I have given up my material body,

knowing that she was there for me..

'twas then that she drew me close,

laid her unblemished visage on my heart,

nestled against my arms, and

like a newborn baby in her mother's arms, slept

into the wee hours of the multi coloured dawn.....

Of snorkeling

The water was a refreshingly cool 72 F. The sun beat down through the tree canopy and glistened in speckled patterns upon the dark waters of ginnie springs. I adjusted my mask and blow pipe and stepped in. Swimming a little bit out, I looked underwater with my masks and was transported to another dimension. The still, sleek water was a portal to another world - a world embodied by nature's pristine beauty. The water was crystal clear and had a tinge of blue - a halo almost.I paddled at a brisk pace and came across an underwater cave entrance about 30 feet deep with scuba diver's at the bottom. The sunlight filtered through the water in shafts and rays, creating spangled art on the bottom and glinting off the mass of bubbles released by the divers. The real world's sounds were drowned out, the problems of daily life forgotten, and nothing mattered except the sight I beheld. I wallowed over the divers for some time, flitting between their bubbles and the spring's air bubbling up from the rocks soaking in the moment. Then, I dove in and made it half way to the bottom of the cave entrance but the pressure forced me to come back up again. Now, I understand to most of my american friends snorkeling is not a big deal. Its one of the things almost every american has done while growing up. But to me it was something I had only watched in movies and to actually be here and experience it was mind blowing. We then decided to go to a spring that was a mile downstream connected by the Santa Fe river. This spring was bigger , slightly shallower, had a bigger cave entrance and lot of fishes. Again I dived down near the cave entrance and watched scuba divers exploring the underwater grottos with their halogen flashlights. I chased a couple of fishes as I followed the contours of the spring as it fed the Santa Fe river. I left behind the other swimmers as I neared the coalescence of the spring and the river. I turned on my back underwater and looked up at the trees on either side of the spring, the sun shining through them and then the water. It was one of those rare moments that I felt so close to nature - almost one with it. I just cannot explain that feeling in words....One will have to experience it to fully appreciate it.